Changes
by annilra
Summary: 300905 hitsugayaxhinamori - hinamori finds that everything changes


bleach drabble  
hitsugaya/hinamori  
hinamori finds that everything changes

note : spoilers for the soul society arc, takes place a while after that period, and once again, i do not own bleach (796 words)

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Changes

There seems to have been many changes in Soul Society since that fateful day that Hinamori Momo had almost died at the hands of someone she trusted the most.

Some were glaringly obvious, like the 3 new appointed captains of the divisions that were suddenly bereft of leadership. The yearly performance reviews and evaluation for existing shinigamis had since then, been made a quarterly mandatory duty for all divisions across all levels.

Others were more subtle and only noticed by a certain few, more observant among them. The way the 11th division and 4th division shinigamis have become less hostile to each other. And how certain Ryokas seem to have free access to Soul Society following that fateful day, namely to the 13th division grounds.

However, the one change that was somehow both obvious and subtle but was definitely the most distressing to Hinamori, was the lack of a certain _something_ between her and Hitsugaya Toushiro. She couldn't quite find the words to describe what exactly she felt was missing but she knew it had happened only after she had woken up from those nearly fatal wounds.

He was still as protective as ever, snapping at anyone who even dared to _breathe_ wrong near her. Still took time out of his busy schedule to walk her to her destination if they happen to cross each other's paths. Still look disgruntled whenever his co-captain teases him about Hinamori.

But despite all these achingly familiar characteristics, she still felt something had changed between them. She had no idea what it was but it was slowly causing her to panic, making her feel like she was losing him somehow.

Determined to prove her own doubting heart wrong, she climbed up to the 10th division office rooftop where she knew Toushiro always went stargazing during his regular bouts of insomnia. Sure enough, he was standing there, balancing himself effortlessly on the edge.

She knew he was aware that she had walked to stand just behind him, even treading as silently as she did. It was just part of their bond that she had once thought was indestructible.

With an almost silent gasp, she realized that Toushiro was almost taller than her now. They were nearly at the same height and standing this close to each other made that fact obvious.

Toushiro barely turned his head at the faint sound she had made. "What is it, Hinamori?"

She frowned slightly. There was a vaguely distant quality to his question. As though he really didn't care what she actually wanted. She pushed aside the part of her that didn't really want to know the truth. With a deep breath, she rushed out her thoughts, "Ne, Toushiro-kun. Is there something wrong between us? Are you angry at me about something?"

Hinamori more sensed than saw the way he tensed at the question. She rushed on quickly, hoping it was just her imagination the way his posture now seemed more stiff than before. In an effort to push against that invisible resistance, she babbled on. "Cos if I said something or did anything that made you angry or upset with me, I assure you, I wasn't aware of it. I certainly didn't intentionally do it on purpose. Maybe you can tell me what the problem is and we can talk about - "

_"You broke my fucking heart!!!"_

They both froze at his outburst. He slowly turned his deep blue eyes to hers and she could see that they looked more icy than ever.

That wrenching statement was like the bursting of a dam and now it seemed to pour out all the emotions he had always held back. "Everything I ever did was for you. I came here and became a shinigami to be with you! I became a captain so that I know I'm strong enough, in all the ways that count, just so that I can protect you!"

"Shiro..."

"And you go and believe the word of that betrayer over mine! You actually attacked me just for the sake of his mere _memory_..."

Hinamori felt her eyes water at the raw tone of pain in his words. She lifted her hands to blindly reach out to him. "No, no, don't say - "

"I promised that I'll always protect you, Hinamori. That much won't change. But I refuse to love you like I did before, just so that you can rip out my heart and stomp on it all over again."

He neatly stepped away from her out-stretched hands and jumped off the ledge of the rooftop. And just like that, she was alone. More alone than she had ever been.

Because now, she didn't even have Toushiro... and that was the one thing that she had never thought would change.

end

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is it just me, or are my drabbles getting longer & longer? these two were just super adorable before the whole thing somehow turned darker for me at the end of the arc. i actually don't think this scenario will ever happen and i'm hoping it never will, cos i really like these two together! ;)


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